Now if you’ve run out of reasons why you can’t vote, here are some more to save your day. Just toss in these excuses when someone asks you. Be sure to screw your country – do it proudly.
- Reason No. 3: The black mark they will put on my finger would make me look like Goga Kapoor. I am afraid I’ll lose my identity.
- Reason No. 2: I am a Shakladwipi Brahman (or a Mayuri Kumhar, or a or a Suryavanshi Rajput or some sub caste/caste) and the voting booth is across a stream and we are not allowed to cross water streams on Tuesdays. Plus, the stream is coming right from Kailash and will flow into the Bay of Bengal so by the time I go around it, the voting would any way be closed. Unless I go missing for two days.
- Reason No. 1: We have a family of 8 (or 6 or 4 or 2 or some even number) – and half of us would vote for Congress while the other half for BJP. So it cancels out each others’ votes – so we decided to have a mini election at our house and not go bothering the Election Commission. See, how socially responsible and extra smart we are?
Yes you are. Let’s get together and f**k this nation by not voting and finding more excuses. Thanks!